Book Review: I Laughed When I Wrote It by Alan Zoldan

I Laughed When I Wrote It
518 Of My Funniest Tweets
Alan Zoldan
SynergEbooks, April 2018
ISBN: 978-0-744-32379-5
Trade Paperback

If ever there was a more important time to read this book by Alan Zoldan, I don’t know, nor can I imagine, when it was/could be!

I can only speak for myself of course, but if I ever needed the laughs that this book provides, it is now!  At a time when reading the morning newspapers, or watching the news on tv, was more depressing than it is now, I can’t imagine when that time was!  Mr. Zoldan has, in providing us with “518 of [his] Funniest Tweets,” given us just the break from today’s reality that we [although again I can only speak for myself] need desperately!  The author wrote the book after 7 years and 895 tweets, and his selection is excellent!

I guess the only way I can back this up, and illustrate the author’s sense of humor, is to give you a few examples. The sections are headed Laughing at Myself, Cultural Quips, Random Observation, One Liners, and Rated “R” for Raunchy, which starts off with a line from Woody Allen:  “Don’t knock masturbation.  It’s sex with someone you love.”  Some of the other things included in this section:  “My wife and I were happy for 22 years – and then we met;”  “I really don’t believe in meaningless sex.  I mean, at the very least, it means that you’ve had sex;” “Just once I’d like to relapse at a Sex Addicts Anonymous meeting;” …Protected sex is way too expensive.  Not everyone can afford a bodyguard you know;” . . .  “I never got into Twitter for the fame, money,or sex – which, as things are turning out, is just as well.”   Among the one-liners:  “After all is said and done, there is usually much more said than done . . . The results of my friend’s IQ test were negative . . . My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her . . . or something like that . . . If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong . . . Change is inevitable – – except from a vending machine .. . The last thing I want to do is hurt you.  But it’s still on my list . . . I think someone stopped the payment on my reality check . . .  Is there another word for synonym?”  I’ll stop the quotes now, because I’m sure you’ve already decided to go out and buy the book – good thinking!

As per the notes that the publisher has included at the end of the book, headed “About the Author,” the latter “believes that this is the book America needs at this time.”  Truer words were never written!  Highly recommended.

Reviewed by Gloria Feit, August 2018.

Book Review: A Slot Machine Ate My Midlife Crisis by Irene Woodbury

A Slot Machine Ate My Midlife Crisis
Irene Woodbury
SynergEbooks, August 2011

My review policy: I am not a professional reviewer; I don’t get paid to review books.

This book came to me via a gifted Kindle download, but accepting the book in no way obligated me to give a good review. I try to be fair in all of my reviews and reveal up front how I review.

Using the Amazon five star rating as a guide, I lop off a point of a star for each typo, misspelling, and grammatical error I encounter. Five points gone, one star lost. This star can be regained by a fascinating plot, memorable characters, stellar writing, and, in the end, the story leaves me wanting more from the author. All that said, here is my review of A Slot Machine Ate My Midlife Crisis. (THREE STARS)

First off, we usually expect Chick Lit (which this book is touted as) to introduce us to a character who, through her trials and tribulations, takes us on a fun and interesting trip with her, culminating in a satisfying end result. Unfortunately, this book doesn’t do that, mainly because of the protagonist, Wendy.

Wendy seems to have it all. Although currently unemployed, she has major credentials in fashion retail, she just married the man of her dreams (her first marriage, by the way, at forty-five), and a new colonial mansion in Houston she has carte blanche to renovate. But Wendy, who is possibly the most self-centered, unlikable character I’ve encountered in many a book, isn’t happy. And rather than, say, get a new job, put up with her husband’s (whom she professes to be mad about) bosses’ society wives (how dare them accept her into their social circles and try to include her in all of their activities?) she runs off to Vegas. And stays.

I won’t give away too much more of the plot, but if you want a tour guide of restaurants and clubs in Las Vegas, and have a big fat wallet to blow on them, this a good book for you.

Reviewed by guest reviewer Jinx Schwartz, November 2011.