What’s Love Got to Do With It?

sunny-frazier-6Returning guest blogger Sunny Frazier, whose first novel in the Christy Bristol Astrology Mysteries, Fools Rush In, received the Best Novel Award from Public Safety Writers Association, is here today with her thoughts on romance, Valentine’s Day and the ubiquitous Valentine’s Day cards.

The third Christy Bristol Astrology Mystery, A Snitch in Time, is in bookstores now.

sunny69@comcast.net   //  http://www.sunnyfrazier.com

I don’t know Tina Turner, I’ve been asking myself that for years. Now it’s that time again. Cupids with their arrows of love and hearts that never get broken (eaten perhaps). Men forgetting to order flowers until February 14 and then scrambling to find a florist at the last minute. Going out to dinner at a place that doesn’t have a drive-through.

sunny-frazier-valentien-cardI’m happily single. I’ve done the ritual many times with many dates, usually an awkward disappointment. At 65 I leave all that to younger women who crave the romance. They see it on soap operas, reality TV and in movies. They want the knight in shining armor to ride up and sweep them away for their happily ever after.

So, how did the execution of a saint turn into romance and presents? You can put much of the blame on Geoffrey Chaucer and his love poems in the 1300’s. Britain upped the ante in the 1700’s by offering words of love in a handy book, encouraging men to create their own cards.  Apparently that Where Angels Fearwas too much work because by the 1800’s cards were being manufactured. Now, in America alone, over 190 million cards are sent—and that doesn’t include the cards school kids exchange. No wonder Valentine’s Day has been tagged “Hallmark Holiday.”

The relationships I treasure these days are the ones with other women my age. They are smart, funny and they cut loose when they leave their husbands at home. We do lunch, we do tea. We bare our souls to each other. We offer advice or just an ear to listen. My friends are always there for me and have proven it many times.

While other couples dress up, deal with traffic and weather, I will be cuddled up in a comforter,  a cup of tea, a good book and a cat or two. Maybe I’ll order delivery, buy myself some flowers and treat myself to my favorite chocolates. If that knight in shining armor rides up on his white stead, I’m gonna lock the door and call the cops.

sunny-frazier-heart-book

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16 thoughts on “What’s Love Got to Do With It?

  1. Hi Sunny!! So happy to see you back, and good grief, you lost weight. I adore your trilogy, and hope you write more. I truly wish we lived closer—we have so many things in common ( including your name). Stay well and be happy!

  2. PS. I will be spending today in much the same way; thinking of getting a new baby ( tea cup Yorkie) …I might treat myself to an eye pencil, though and a heck of a lot of sleep.

  3. Haha! I love this attitude. Although, I must admit to receiving a loving card from husband this morning. We women, however, need our friends and our independence as you so well put it.

  4. Ah, but, Sunny, there is a flip side. To begin, a young romantic must get her head on straight and choose wisely. My mother, contemplating another divorce, cautioned that I must never marry; that I was a clone of her and would never be happy married. I believed her. My rule of thumb became, “If you can be happy any other way, do not wed.” Bill was my best friend for nearly two years before he asked me out. He said, “Don’t invite all your friends, this is a date.” We’ve been happily wed for 53 years. We have sustained one another through births (four children), and deaths, disappointments and triumphs. He remains my best friend, closest ally, and most gentle critic.

    I write romantic suspense. Recently Bill said, “Do you use everything I say in your books?” My answer was, “Pretty much.” He is a great source for romantic comedy and he doesn’t even try. —Sharon Ervin, author of the upcoming MEMORY, my twelfth published novel.

    • Actually, I married my best friend after two years of friendship. But, we both liked being alone, so we divorced 10 years later and have been best friends for 35 years. But, we never took “romance” seriously. We’re just too practical for that.

  5. I lost my husband almost two years ago, and honestly? I have no desire to meet someone else. I was in my fifties when I met him and had actually stopped dating. I’ll leave romance to other people, books and movies. I had my good times, my romantic moments and a good life. A relationship is hard work. Would I do it again? Only if it was with the same man. : )

    • I remember when you lost your husband. I know very few women that want to re-marry at a later stage in their life. There is so much freedom in being single.

  6. LOL! I can relate, even though I’ve been married for nearly 50 years. If for some reason (and at hubby & my age, I can guess the reason) I no longer had a husband, I would not be the least bit interested in acquiring another one. They are highly overrated, although useful for many things, like changing motor oil and catching the occasional mouse . . .

  7. You are looking good and 65? Wow! Time flies. I always wanted to be married, but it didn’t happen until I was in my late 30s. My husband has back problems and bad arthritis, so in some ways I am single. Even when he could walk, I went on most trips by myself (or with my step kids in the earlier years) as he was a home body. I don’t mind going places alone or without him, but I would hate not to have someone to come home to. P.S. If he were gone I wouldn’t be interested in another husband like someone else said here, and that would be no different if I were 25 years younger.

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